So I figure as I sit here in a bar off my 3rd glass of wine, its a perfect time to talk about the story I promised to explain about the chinese girl whom I had to take to the police station. Why not?
It all started when I met this girl in a bar while I was hanging out with my Taiwanese friend, Eva. She sat next to us, and we talked to her, she later revealed she plays the piano…great because I make music and so I figured this would be a good network to have her play and use some samples. I didn’t think much of it. Anyways the next day I get a phone call from her, she is asking me what I’m up too. I guess she went back to the bar and thought that I would be there again (on a Sunday? um no), I told her I was home and relaxing. She asks if she can come over and chill….hmmmm…at 11pm? errr ok.
She comes over and she has a bag which appears to be clothes…hmmmm……signs are interesting here. Anyways she ends up spending the night ahem. Nothing too unusual about that but she ends up staying for like 3 days. I didnt really have a problem with it. Good times ya know? Anyways this girl starts getting hella bogus and stalkerish like coming over without calling. She came over a couple of times after that but she would always stay for a day or 2, and do things like call and say shes at the mall complex shopping and if she could come over because shes in the area, and then when I would agree, literally be at my door within 5 min….wtf!!!!!!
So remember how I said I was moving? She offered for me to stay at her place, which was great because I just needed a place to stay for like a week and she wasn’t charging. I figured meh, I know its a bad idea but I was a bit desperate at that time. She also helped me move….and put my stuff in her house. Now granted something strange happened when we got to her place with Chen, who drove. we get there…and as soon as Chen leaves…she leaves, wtf? I have nothing in the frig (not even water) and she disappears. Well I wake up in the morning and decide this isn’t good for me, so I called up an american friend of mine Eugene and tell him to pick me up, I loaded up a backpack with about 3-4 days worth of clothes and I was outta there. Luckily I had a plan B. The beach house I was staying in the earlier entry. I had booked that with my spanish friend Jose he said I could stay there while he was in Spain, his place was in in badaguan (old german colony part of town) it was baller so why not.
Here is where things get a bit weird. Once the girl found out that I moved out…she starts freaking out. I started getting some extremely patriotic, almost communist speeches, at this point…I’m freaking out because my stuff…all my stuff is at her house. Uh Oh.
By now its the end of the week and my place in Chengyang was ready, I could get my stuff from her place and get my shit out ASAP. I call her up and tell her I need my stuff, she starts giving me loaded excuse about how shes not home. WTF. This chick is always home (except when Im there). She was keeping my stuff hostage! I called Chen and told him to call her to tell her to stop fucking around. I guess because Chen is an older chinese gent, she stated we could grab my cloths Saturday morning. I think she thought we were playing but we rolled over there first thing in the morning, there was no way I was going to risk my possessions at her place. We knock and knock and knock….she finally answers after pretending to be asleep. Me and Chen go in there and load his car up with my stuff, I went back for the last box…and here is where shit gets real. Chen is downstairs waiting for me……I come out the room….and she is blocking the door ….yooooo wtf? Shes in front of the door and wont let me leave!. I’m like yo what are you doing? Quit playing. It was like something out of the movies. As soon as I would go to grab her to move her out the way, she would yell as if I was harming her..uh oh no good hands off. She starts asking me why I wanted to leave and why I wouldn’t stay with her…err did you forget about the text message you sent me 48 hours ago? and about how america and americans should burn in hell? I tell her its because I found a cheap place and that her area wasn’t suitable for me. She starts crying and pouting telling me I owed her money for storing my stuff at her place (an excuse) and that she was going to call her dad if I didn’t pay up…well I agree that she should call her dad…at this point Chen is knocking on her door like crazy because its been about 20 min and I haven’t gone down. Through the door I’m telling him what is happening and so he calls the cops.
She finally opens the door and we all go outside. Her dad, the cops, magically all appear at the same time. Now at this point I don’t know whats going on because everything, including her crying, is being said in chinese, but from what I gather with my limited chinese is that she is lying to them telling them her I owe her money for storing my clothes (using an excuse for her insanity). The cops ask her where the contract is? She obviously doesn’t have one. Now the cops are starting to sense her bullshit…even her father. A crowd has now also formed outside to see the spectacle. eventually the cops decide I’m innocent but we still need to file a report and they also need to see my passport (which was in the beach house) to make sure I was in the country legally (normal procedure). I agree. First we go to the beach house to get a copy, she remained in the cop station where they told her ass off, and they finally told me she was crazy (after hearing her 100 excuses) and that I shouldn’t tell her where my new location would be. They also told her she was to stay 200 yards from me. The cops were cool, they followed us in the car and would throw up peace signs, we took pics and all that.
The end…… or was it?
I saw her about a month later in Qbar, and she came, we saw each other but she kept her distance. The bartender came over and handed me a beer….she apparently bought me a drink…I passed it over to a friend. She tried to come over and talk…but I didn’t say a word or give her eye contact. She tried to act like nothing ever happened. This chick was wild.