Month: November 2014

Chinese bars and chinese products.

/ knox / Leave a comment

entry: 3/18/12

Chinese hard drives are made out of potato chips. Am I seriously about to go thru my third one in a month? This format better work or I’m working off my external from here on out. Or til I can get to an apple store.

Bars in QD are usually full til about midnight, that’s when the Chinese start dropping like flies. By 3 it’s mostly westerners with a couple of Chinese guys passed out in a corner. Haha. They can not hold their liquor for the life of them. They have this little thing called *ganbei* which ultimately means *chug/drink it all*. but heres the thing, they do this with everything: beer, spirits, red wine, and combined. After about 45 min, theyre completely hammered. It is chinese culture to ganbei with you, buy you all the liquor and pretty much try to drink you under the table, while failing miserably because us westerners are quite accustomed to drinking since bars have been a part of our culture since god knows when.

I remember being invited to a friends house for dinner and her dad just kept going and going, mind you, I had to meet up with friends at a bar after this dinner, so I was trying to pace myself, enjoy my beer, leave room for the food, but he kept saying no no no ganbei, you must ganbei, Im like look man, just save your beer cause I can drink like a fish and youre just going to pass out, and sure enough he was hugging the toilet like it was his newly found best friend by 11pm. I, of course, continued on to the bar. That is where I saw one couple, yes both the guy and the girl, being carried out like freshly hunted game by their limbs, covered in their own vomit. 3 chinese guys offered me drinks, and of course they ganbei, and next thing I know 2 go to the bathroom and never come back out. Lets not get into what I see outside my apartment complex at this time. Literally everybody and their mother stumbling back home, women being carried, youd have thought there was a natural disaster and red cross needed to be called in. Hilarious.

MAN DOWN! MAN DOWN!
MAN DOWN! MAN DOWN!

Really bruh? you drunk and the sun still up? you drunk in the MIDDLE of dinner? smh.

Really bruh? you drunk and the sun still up? you drunk in the MIDDLE of dinner? smh.

Chinese drivers are awful.

/ knox / 6 Comments

Can someone explain to me how you crash into a car that is on the opposite side making a left turn when youre in the left lane turning in the opposite direction? absolutely brilliant. I have seen some shit you wouldnt believe. I once saw a car on the freeway miss its exit, hit the car in reverse to get back to it. LOL. Ive also seen a car stop smack in the fast lane, I always thought pulling over to the furthest right hand lane (if there isnt an emergency lane) was universal. apparently not. Ive also had Chen stop in front of a freeway exit to grab some cigs, oh and he also parked his car on the wrong side of the road, in front of oncoming traffic. think Im lying? picture below. Im not making this stuff up.

how?


parked on the wrong side of the road in front of oncoming traffic. O_O

And I’m back from Yantai. That food poisoning tho.

/ knox / Leave a comment

entry: 3/11/12

Good times. Highlights include hot springs and jumping a 6 ft wall partially paralyzed. Proof you can make wise and dumb decisions within a matter of moments lol. Also learned Bai jiu (chinese rice hard liquor) is dangerous.

Today is the first day having a real appetite since friday’s food poisoning episode in Yantai. I’m scarfing down chocolate sprinkle donuts like there’s no tomorrow. That food poisoning was lethal tho. Bad case of projectile vomit. Looked like a super soaker, coming out like fffffffsssssuugggghhhffffffsssss *birds move out the way* ffffffsssssss*bucket tips over from force* noo uugghhhummfffssssssss, like I could spray down the driveway, it was amazing. The sharp pain in my gut for about 12 hours was very revealing and revitalizing. Bad chinese chicken = life changing. : Confucius 1:23:

Quote of the day: “I heard stripping butt naked while getting a beat down always stops the fight. Who fights a naked person anyway?” LOL

Valentines in China? wtf?

/ knox / Leave a comment

entry: 2/14/12

How am I getting sucked into valentine’s day in China? Who taught them this holiday gah! I thought I was cooking just to cook

her: valentine dinner?

me: wait what?

her: its valentine’s day isn’t it

me: how do you kn……

Ugh I really hate being forced to buy things because of a holiday someone pulled out their….a century ago.. whatever I’ll be nice.  Truth be told, I felt better about the dinner before I knew it was going to be associated with this lame day. Do things because you want to be kind, not because a day tells you too. Oh well guess Im doing the latter regardless. *shrugs*

Back in Qingdao

/ knox / Leave a comment

entry: 2/13/12

Back in Qingdao. A city that gives you so many feelings and thoughts at once. It may not be as organized as Seoul, but there’s no denying it has a certain charm to it. It’s people are shy with a dash of innocence, they are extremely inquisitive yet friendly, they will smile when smiled upon, but are lost when ordered. Most importantly, Qingdaonese will put a smile on your face without even trying.

Chinese New Years. This is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever experienced in my life

/ knox / Leave a comment

entry: 1/23/12

Fireworks since 6:45am til now 8:45am and it’s snowing outside. NYE was a week ago, but the explosion go on and on for a week to 10 days at all hours, yes ALL HOURS after. It’s the mornings that piss me  off the most. Fuckingassholes, had a dream a rogue communist tank was smashing through shibei only to wake up to fireworks. lol

about 5 yards from my window.

Chinese women are kinda off. (other random rants)

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entry: 1/13/12

Chinese chicks are kinda off. Not that women in general aren’t off, but this is like a different kinda off. Hard to explain but I’m not exactly sure getting used to it is healthy either. I play the game, but jesus help us all. Yes. I am dating my first chinese girl. Bella. and the cultural differences are apparent. Ill get into this further in future blogs.

Me and Bella

Also,  I knew this day would come, but when it did I was in shock. This korean restaurant we went too last night……served dog. I thought I’d be whatever about it, but I got all quiet when they told me. “Mark are you ok, is everything ok” hahaha I was like damn. I actually stopped eating as well.

You know what’s funny, is I find myself feeling a bit strange and uneasy about the lack of local authorities, yet nothing ever happens around here. I wonder why I have this ‘uneasy feeling’ and I’ve come to the conclusion that It’s because I grew up in a police state, so now with no police around, I feel like something should go down any minute. but. nothing. then you think about the U.S and they’ve got the most organized police forces in the world, like LAPD, and there’s still 890 murders a year. Aint that somethin. Don’t get me wrong tho, god forbid we have Qingdao PD replace LAPD, LA would turn into Katrina within 24 hours, but how is it americans think communist china is a police state, when in actuality it’s YOU ALL that live in a police state. Freedom with 8 million laws behind it. *chin stroke*

Asia = Twilight Zone TAKE 4 — I just realized this is the first time I’ve ever lived on the east coast….YET I’m still married to the pacific ocean. WEIRD.