I was in the shower then…..

I see this mid sized hairy spider on the wall. I’m like “you know you dun fucked up right? now you know you dun fucked up?” I aim my AK shower head at it, and right before the water hit it, it jumped off the wall, and at me. why did I do the chicken dance like Mayweather hit me with a stiff left jab, then did the dougie (if you’re under 30 just google it), and I may or may not have let out a homer simpson scream. son of a bi…..and I don’t think it went in the drain, so this bastard is still in the house, and now vengeful. FUCK.

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